What is it that stops your normal, everyday guy from having the type of woman, or number of women, in his life that he truly desires? I believe that there are three main reasons. Three things that if attended to, any man would improve his ability with women.
1) Get your appearance up to scratch
This is constantly overlooked in both the pick-up community and general male population. You must get your appearance up to scratch and do the best with what you have in order to stand any chance of being successful with women. Looks count, period. Not for everything, but much more than most guys are willing to accept. A lot of guys, especially in the pick-up community, skip this part and go straight to approaching. But your success really starts well before you even open your mouth. Approaching definitely is great, however unless you’re looking up to at least decent (body, face, teeth, hair, and especially clothing), your return (girls) on investment (time/approaches) will remain low. You definitely do not need to be of model quality, but simply looking the best that you can will immediately improve how women respond to you, even if you’re not approaching and it’s only those in your social circle or at work.
2) Get out there and make it happen
The concept of going out to intentionally approach and meet women for most men is still something completely foreign. Most guys know that it could happen if they go out, but never put in any conscious effort to actually make it happen. They expect it to “just happen”. They do not designate time and effort into proactively meeting women. In short, they wait on fate.
Women are everywhere: bars, clubs, parks, streets, supermarkets, shopping malls, beaches, etc, and all of the single ones want to meet someone. At any point in time you can literally stand up and go out and meet someone. It may not be the first girl that you meet, nor the second or third, but if you commit to it and push through any sense of shame and anxiety in approaching, you will find yourself a lovely lady.
3) Show that you’re interested
You meet a girl, you get chatting, she seems friendly, you seem to get along well, but you don’t show interest in her for fear of losing what you “have going”. This leads to nice conversations, but no dates. It leads to nice friends, but no girlfriends. It leads to conversation eventually going stale instead of going flirty. What is the point of meeting cool girls if you never see any of them again?
Of the genuine guys who do work up the confidence to go out and meet girls, a large proportion of them are paranoid of how a girl will respond if they show that they’re interested in her. So they hold back, clinging to idle chit-chat or trying to play games. They don’t attempt to escalate the matter, be it by actively stating interest, flirting with her, asking for her number, complimenting her, indicating what they like about her, touching her, physically escalating, etc. A girl may not ponder how she actually feels about you unless you show her that you yourself are interested. And if you do and it isn’t reciprocated, that’s fine, you now know where you stand and can decide how and if you wish to proceed based on that, rather than wondering and wondering. (Also how you deal with a ‘no thanks’ can often work in your favour if done correctly). What is important is to show interest in an easy-going, casual, carefree manner, without any kind of pressure.
If your dating life could use a kick-start, or if you want to really ramp up your game, book a session today.